Drinking Driving & the Perfect Crime

You may have read my post on "Drinking Driving Killing". This post also concerns drinking and driving, though fortunately, no killing. This post is about a perfect crime.

First, what is a perfect crime? Wikipedia says is a colloquial term used to characterize crimes that are undetected, unattributed to a perpetrator, or else unsolved as a kind of technical achievement on the part of the perpetrator. There is an element that the crime is (or appears likely to be) unable to be solved.

Now, let us look at this perfect crime. The Times of India reported one morning that Mr. Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu was returning home after a few drinks in his Ford Endeavour. He hit a cyclist, not injuring him seriously, and drove on. A journalist on a scooter chased him down stopped him and soon our police force was on hand. Remember the Mumbai Police are the finest in the world, on par with Scotland Yard. The official Mumbai Police website says they are custodians of our trust!!!. That is an actionable lie if I ever saw one. Please do have a look at the Mission Statement of the Mumbai Police. Hilarious and lies, dammed lies.

Our valiant boys in uniform arrested him, whereupon Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu did exactly what any normal person would do when arrested. Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu said (i)  he was the son of a Inspector General of Police in Punjab therefore should not be arrested (ii) he called his father (iii) his father called our boys and said ‘go easy’ (iv) father’s pal a similarly placed senior police officer called and told our boys to go easy (v) Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu abused our boys (vi) Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu was violent in the hospital where he was taken for a blood test and this is the best part (vii) Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu refused to give the doctors a blood sample. Mind you all this happened when Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu was in police custody.

What do our boys, the finest in the world do? They place Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu in custody, produce him before a magistrate the next day. They tell the magistrate that Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu is a very naughty boy, he was violent and refused to give a blood sample. However, our clever cops, asked 3 doctors to examine Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu externally and the doctors, according to our boys, were of the unanimous opinion on the basis of a physical examination that Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu was drunk. The magistrate orders a medical examination after which Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu is granted bail.

I am sure my alert readers would have now realised what has happened. A day after, there is no way that the blood test will reveal excessive alcohol enough to get a conviction.

What happens next? Some sort of trial will commence and the Court will after going thru the evidence dismiss the case since the blood test would show no alcohol.

What does this all mean? Let us look at this dispassionately. Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu did all that he could to save his skin, including simply refusing to have a blood test done. What is wrong with that? His father did all he could to save his son. Is that unusual? No, not in my book. The cops clearly did not do their job. They had Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu in custody and did not carry out a blood test knowing full well how crucial that was. Their excuse was that Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu was violent. I mean come on!!!

So Paramdeep Parminder Sandhu did his job, the Court will do their job and dismiss the case and only our corrupt, smart, best in the world cops have not done their job.

Is this not a perfect crime where the crime attributed to a perpetrator, is left unsolved as a kind of technical achievement on the part of the perpetrator.

Three cheers for our cops.

Satyamev Jayate